the day i became "grape"

6/20/07

This is one of those days wehre I probably should have started journaling earlier. I hate play-by-play entries, but there have been a lot of adventures. No boring days at camp, for sure.

Morning went a lot better today... I'm not as grumpy as I was yesterday, either. I'm a lot more aware of my moods here... namely because people aren't afraid to point them out. Everything gets pointed out.. you're with the same 30 staff all summer. Everything moves fast.

So patience is a virtue.. and I need to keep telling myself that. I'm having a lot of trouble with patience in the cabin -- Lord, I hope I'm not showing it, but sometimes my heart is just overwhelmingly frustrated. Somehow we ended up with two wheelchairs and a woman who is blind in one cabin.. plus a camper who wanders and another who needs play-by-play encouragement. So getting from point A to point B is so challenging.

And going to the bathroom. They never tell you until you're all at the pool, in the bathing suit, shoes off, one foot in the water. Then they remember. So out of the water, on go the shoes, slowly walk up to the bathroom... you feel like you're going backwards. Inopportune for me, I suppose.

So I was thinking about the frustrations, and a song from Sister Hazel popped in my head... "If you're tired of fighting battles with yourself, change your mind."

The fact that I view getting from point A to point B as an accomplishment says a lot... I need to relax and go along for the ride, I suppose. Like... view each step as an accomplishment, rather than each milestone. That way, if you go backwards, you can still make progress. You're still walking.

It's a new lifestyle I'm trying to adapt...

Oh, and on a closing note, I got my fruit nickname today. One of the camper workers gives them out.. his is watermelon.. but yes, mine is now Grape. It's an honor, for sure.

Lots of other things happened today, but it's bedtime. So enough of that. Grape is signing off.



Hey, Hey
Did you ever think
There might be another way
To just feel better,
Just feel better about today

Oh no
If you never want to have
To turn and go away
You might feel better,
Might feel better if you stay

Bridge
Yeah yeah
I bet you haven't heard
A word I've said
Yeah yeah
If you've had enough
Of all your tryin'
Just give up
The state of mind you're in…

If you want to be somebody else,
If you're tired of fighting battles with yourself
If you want to be somebody else
Change your mind...

Hey hey
Have you ever danced in the rain
Or thanked the sun
Just for shining- just for shining
Or the sea?
Oh no- take it all in
The world's a show
And yeah, you look much better,
Look much better when you glow

Hey hey
what ya say
We both go and seize the day
'cause what's your hurry
what's your hurry anyway

change your mind . sister hazel