inspiration

yay, jessie. yay, yay, yay!

i finally got to see jessie. *finally*. and it was one of those things where it didnt' feel like we hadn't seen each other since she left for england. which i plan to attribute to our kindred spirits. we got to catch up over coffee, mid-afternoon dessert, and hippie-watching in asheville. perfect :)

so thought for the day... inspiration. the most fulfilling relationships in my life are those of mutual inspiration -- where each person is inspired by the other, by the world around them. i've realized that i can attribute every failed relationship (by relationship i'm mostly talking about the friend kind) in my life to some sort of flunked inspiration. either one of us wasn't inspired by our own life, or we failed to be inspired by each others'... or even more bizarre, one was too inspired by the world around them and it blew up.

not literally, of course. although.. perhaps the buick was a bit too inspired.

stepping beyond friendship to family... as i grow older, i'm more inspired and awed by my parents and my brothers. no matter what sort of family drama befalls us (and there has been plenty), they've never ceased to amaze me. i am fully convinced that my mom has the most beautiful, hilarious personality in the world... and that my dad could get our entire family out of any awful circumstance with a roll of duct tape and a match (those of you who know my dad, i'm sure, will agree). pat will always blindly attract the ladies, eric will always be able to get out of anything with a wink and a grin, and nolan will always be the kid who gives life his best shot. they're incredible. and as i'm more inspired by them, our relationship grows. i feel like inspiration comes with age, too... which makes me look forward to the future.

stepping beyond family to God -- my relationship with the world falls apart when i don't feel inspired -- when i don't seek to be inspired. i get grumpy, i get selfish, i get mean-spirited... i'm no longer myself. which makes total sense -- we are formed by what inspires us, by the world we seek for ourselves. my formation -- who i am, who i am meant to be -- falls apart when i'm not held up by reflection and prayer... and by the fruitful life that stems from reflection and prayer.

look at the feet, rather than the lips.

hmm.. so that's my new little goal (i seem to be finding lots of those these days)... be inspired. and don't be afraid of potential inspiration.

like... per say... this summer. i got an e-mail back from one of the top autism researchers in the country -- and she has space in her lab for me to work this summer... which blows my mind -- this is the chance i've been looking for. i'm a little scared, which is silly -- i know that i cannot pass up this opportunity -- i got butterflies when i read her response. it will be incredible and life changing and amazing experience for grad school discernment (she's one of the top professors in a great clinical phd program)... it's just scary to seek inspiration where we've never sought it before, you know?

:) i'm excited.

so, onward and upward, yes? it's time to grow up. sort of. ;)

so tonight i'm packing and heading to greer, and tomorrow we're heading to myrtle until the 1st to go see corey smith on new years eve!!!!!!!!!!!!! which will be amazing and wonderful and i am SO freakin' excited. and then... rush and classes and work starts up again. it's going to be a crazy two weeks, but break has been very relaxing, so i think i'm ready.

many stories to tell when i return, i'm sure! happy new year, everyone!